On driving . . .

Going through my posts, I realize I never really said how hubby's truck accident turned out.  The truck was totaled, with 2 broken axles and a bent frame, plus other damage.  Very scary.  It is probably a miracle he survived.  He now has another truck.  However, he did not drive AT ALL until he test-drove the new-used truck.  I think he scared himself, and I know he scared me!  He is still driving, but not for very long distances.  Also, we just found out he needs cataract surgery, which may have also contributed to the accident, making it harder to see the deer.  In the meantime, if we go anywhere together, I do the driving . . . 

I'm still here!

Dear S and Anonymous (along with all my other readers),

Yes, I have been away for awhile.  Thanks for your concern, S.  I have been a little overwhelmed with all my responsibilities, both in and outside of my immediate household.  Lots of family "drama" going on, and then I come home to more!

Anonymous,
You mention that you did not leave your wife because of the diabetes, but because of the negative attitude.  I can sure relate to that.  Yesterday, my husband felt the need to text me at work just to say he was having a rotten day because he kept falling, couldn't do anything, and had decided to go back to bed.  I chose to not reply, as it sounded just about like every other day.  And he still refuses to use any of the 3 walkers that he has.  In fact, most days he goes to bed just before he knows I am going to get up (after being up all night watching television), sleeps most of the day, and then gets up just in time to drive me insane most of the evening with his negative comments, yelling at me and the dog, etc.  Oh, and also suggestions about what "we" (really meaning "me," as he does nothing) should be doing around the house.  I am not home much these days, so have fallen behind on posting. 

Guess I am just a little depressed . . . :-(  Really need some good weather so that I can go hiking and kayaking again.  It really does help.  In the meantime, I am doing some art journaling.  Have to get the frustrations out somehow!  Hope you all are in a better frame of mind than I am.

Cheers,

Lilly  

Happy New Year to all my readers

Wishing you ALL a wonderful new year.  To all of "us" who are spouses of diabetics (wives and husbands alike), and also to those of you who are diabetic, but read my blog anyway.  Many thanks to all of you who have empathized with me on these "pages," and also shared your insight.  As always, you have helped me maintain my sanity through another difficult year!  Hopefully, I have done likewise for some of you.  May we all work toward and hope for a better year . . .

Lilly

Christmas "Adventure"

We got through the Christmas holidays . . . some of it good, some of it crazy.  Kind of "normal," I guess!  Hubby still overdosed on Christmas cookies, but I was with friends for much of it, which was not a bad thing.  Christmas day, we were all together with family, and it was a good day.  We had taken separate vehicles to my brother's, as there was not room for everyone plus gifts in one vehicle.  Hubby left for home first, with me following a little later.  Halfway home, I got the phone call . . .

Hubby had gotten in an accident with his truck, trying to avoid deer that ran across the road.  He ended up in a very deep ditch, and couldn't open the doors to get out.  He swears that he was airborne for a moment, when he hit a driveway, and then narrowly missed a telephone pole before landing in the ditch.  Oh, and the underside of the truck also caught fire, which he wasn't even aware of, as he called for help.  Fortunately, some "good Samaritan" neighbors came along, recognized what was going on, and helped him climb out the window.

By the time I got there, there were flashing lights everywhere: ambulance, fire and police.  Very scary.  We spent the evening in the emergency room, but he was sent home with only bruises.  It could have been so much worse . . . thankfully, it was not.  The truck is a mess, but hopefully fixable. 

He is now very sore, and not wanting to drive.  I think he scared himself.  Low blood sugar was not an issue this time, but he said his foot slipped off the brake, and hit the accelerator instead . . . maybe because of his spinal stenosis?  Was he aware that he was hitting the accelerator?  I think he's wondering if he should be driving anymore.  Good question . . . should he be?  And what happens if he can't?

Post Thanksgiving

I sincerely hope that everyone had a good Thanksgiving.  My hubby was there for ours.  Is anybody surprised?  He began the day by crashing to the kitchen floor when he got his foot tangled up in his pant leg.  Of course, he informed me that the walker wouldn't have helped prevent that fall, either. 

I had had a discussion with him before the "big blow-up," and had asked him to please monitor his blood sugar very carefully for the holiday, as it is always an issue, and he normally gets nasty when it goes sky-high from eating too much of everything.  I shared with him how this trashes the day.  I think he tried, and we got through the day with no craziness.  I did sit at a different table from him with our friends, as we needed 2 to accommodate everyone. 

I am still not talking that much to him, although he is acting as if nothing happened.  Par for the course.  I have now learned how to check the readings on his glucose testing meter.  The day the blow-up happened, his blood sugars appeared to be in the realm of normal . . .

It was a good day with friends and family.  Thank God for that. 

Happy Freaking Thanksgiving

Went to 5 different places after work tonight, getting odds and ends for Thanksgiving dinner.  Having lots of family and friends over, and I was feeling pretty good about it, as I got everything I need, and looking forward to spending the holiday with people that I love.  I am just pulling out of the last store I had to stop at . . .  

Then I get the phone call.  He asks me to pick up a sub for him for dinner.  I respond (hesitantly, while thinking of the ice cream that's now melting in the back seat) with, "I guess I could . . ." and he cuts me off with, "Well, with that attitude, just forget about it.  I'll get something myself!"  I ask him what attitude, and he continues to rant.  Mind you, he's been home all day, he has a whole refrigerator cram-packed full of food, and he says there's nothing to eat.  Maybe because there's no junk in there?  I finally give up trying to talk to him, as he isn't making any sense and is being very nasty with no reason.  The yelling continues after I get home, and I yell back this time, telling him he needs to check his sugar, and he is way over the top with the way he is acting.  The accusations from him just escalate, as he brings up everything he can think of that I have or haven't done that has pissed him off for the past several months.  Wow, how do I even respond to that? Of course, he is always right, and I am always wrong. :-(  I am so, so tired of always being "the one" who has somehow wronged him.  He always thinks his behavior is just fine!  I did not deserve this crap tonight!

He also informed me that he will not "be there" for Thanksgiving dinner Thursday.  At that point, I responded with, "That's awesome," which I don't think was the response he was going for!  I wanted to ask him where he was going for dinner, since we are having Thanksgiving at our house?  Happy freaking Thanksgiving.

I am now in the basement, in my "woman cave," trying to de-stress.  At least it's quiet down here.

Cheers,

Lilly

Spinal Stenosis and Walkers?

Almost every day when I get home, my husband greets me with another story about how he fell "again," and shows me the bruises.  He now has 3 walkers, and refuses to use any of them.  When I ask him why he doesn't use a walker to prevent the falls, I always get a response that goes something like this: "I can't use the walker for this problem.  It doesn't help, or keep me from falling."  I am really having a hard time swallowing this, as 2 of the walkers have seats on them that allow him to sit down if he gets into trouble.  I'm also (forgive me) getting tired of hearing the same old story, as I feel he could do something to prevent the falls.  I'm really beginning to wonder (not for the first time) if he just enjoys the attention he thinks his "falling stories" will get him.  He doesn't normally fall when we go out.

Anyone out there: if you know anything about spinal stenosis and whether or not walkers can help, I would be very interested in hearing your views.  This is driving me crazy.