Went to 5 different places after work tonight, getting odds and ends for Thanksgiving dinner. Having lots of family and friends over, and I was feeling pretty good about it, as I got everything I need, and looking forward to spending the holiday with people that I love. I am just pulling out of the last store I had to stop at . . .
Then I get the phone call. He asks me to pick up a sub for him for dinner. I respond (hesitantly, while thinking of the ice cream that's now melting in the back seat) with, "I guess I could . . ." and he cuts me off with, "Well, with that attitude, just forget about it. I'll get something myself!" I ask him what attitude, and he continues to rant. Mind you, he's been home all day, he has a whole refrigerator cram-packed full of food, and he says there's nothing to eat. Maybe because there's no junk in there? I finally give up trying to talk to him, as he isn't making any sense and is being very nasty with no reason. The yelling continues after I get home, and I yell back this time, telling him he needs to check his sugar, and he is way over the top with the way he is acting. The accusations from him just escalate, as he brings up everything he can think of that I have or haven't done that has pissed him off for the past several months. Wow, how do I even respond to that? Of course, he is always right, and I am always wrong. :-( I am so, so tired of always being "the one" who has somehow wronged him. He always thinks his behavior is just fine! I did not deserve this crap tonight!
He also informed me that he will not "be there" for Thanksgiving dinner Thursday. At that point, I responded with, "That's awesome," which I don't think was the response he was going for! I wanted to ask him where he was going for dinner, since we are having Thanksgiving at our house? Happy freaking Thanksgiving.
I am now in the basement, in my "woman cave," trying to de-stress. At least it's quiet down here.
Cheers,
Lilly
Oh Lilly, I'm so sorry. I could hear the entire discussion as I was reading this - it's happened so many times in our home. And it is just crazy. I don't think there is any answer. I think it's why the divorce rate is so high in diabetics (didn't I read it was 83%?) I use my art to destress, but lately, I've been getting out of the house taking long drives. I can tell this morning that hubby woke up low. Bracing myself for one of those days. Hang in there - we live for the moments when life is normal.
ReplyDeleteOh Lilly, I am so sorry. It doesn't help to know that clearly his sugar is so far out of whack that he has no idea what he is doing or saying. He is being awful to you and that just takes all of the joy out of the air!
ReplyDeleteWhen Tom treats me like that, I just totally deflate! It makes me so tired, I don't want to do anything!
But the good news is that you do have other friends and family to surround you with love and comfort tomorrow. Do what you can to tune him out and hope he really does take his meanness out of the house on this warm holiday. Maybe he will be there -- in a good way.
We can always hope, right?