Thursday, December 30, 2010

Depression, or . . . ?

Another day of sleeping all day for hubby.  I don't understand how he can do this.  I think he went to bed about 3 or 4:00 this morning, and is still not up at 9:00 tonight.  Woke up long enough to take his pills when I brought them to him . . . again! At this point, chances are good he will sleep all night and hopefully get up tomorrow.  I'm not sure if this is a side effect of all the meds he is taking, or if it is depression.  My guess is a combination of the two.  At any rate, he doesn't seem overly concerned about it, and at times almost boasts to his doctors that I "let" him sleep all day! 

Have gone to countless doctors, psychiatrists, etc., and no one seems to really put a name to it.  Maybe because they don't know, either?  Don't know if antidepressants he is taking are making it worse.  At the same time, I got a lot done today, without the grousing over nothing I got from him yesterday.  So . . . do I feel glad I had a day of peace, or concerned that he is sleeping his life away? 

At any rate, I had to move to my own bedroom quite some time ago, as the weird hours and his jerking and kicking kept me awake.  I couldn't stay awake/function at work anymore.   All of this makes me so sad, as I really wish that we could enjoy doing more things together, instead of almost always apart.   At this point, even when things are going all right, I find I am on guard, as I don't know what will touch him off, and whether his sugar is high or low.  I am thankful that I have work, good friends, and so many interests that I am able to pursue on my own, or I don't know what I would do! 

2 comments:

  1. I wonder if his sleeping results in no arguments may not be such a bad thing. But it is worrisome.

    You haven't shared your age (estimated) yet with us, but if you are in your 50's like some of us, then you have had to come to the realization that from a physical perspective, your DH is not the man you married. The bedroom can become a very emotional place. Moving into another room makes a great deal of sense -- I haven't had to do that (yet)

    We have a huge room and a huge bed and so far Tom is still doing well enough. But who knows. It seems like it would be more fair for him to move into another room -- but I'm guessing none of them are that thoughtful, if that's the right word.

    Glad you have joined us in the writing world
    Keep at it, even if I don't stay consistent, the writing (and reading) helps. I wish more of us participated....

    Tom's Wife

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  2. Sad to read of your disconnection, hugs and love. Maybe lying beside him when you are awake might be of some comfort. Kind of listening to him and watching him...might make a connection, albeit not very satisfying. just a thought. HUGS

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